The Soviet Toothbrush Manifesto

In Soviet Union, the tooth brushes you.

The Ministry of Oral Hygiene and Beet Production ruled that the most efficient ratio of people to toothbrushes  was 11 to 1.  You all just have to share!

A NEW RULING BY THE MINISTRY OF ORAL HYGIENE AND BEET PRODUCTION HAS, IN THE INTERESTS OF GREATER GOVERNMENTAL EFFICIENCY, IMPROVED TOOTHBRUSH ALLOCATION AND UTILIZATION BY BOOSTING PERSONS PER TOOTHBRUSH FROM AN IMPRESSIVE 11-TO-1 TO AN EVEN MORE COST-EFFECTIVE 220-TO-1.  SINCE A TOOTHBRUSH IS ACTUALLY USED BY AN INDIVIDUAL ONLY 3-4 MINUTES A DAY TOTAL, MOOHBP HAS RULED THAT EVEN AT 220-TO-1, EACH TOOTHBRUSH HAS EXCESS CAPACITY OF ALMOST A FULL 10 HOURS.  THE TRUE CHALLENGE IS THE HAND-OFF.  AND THAT’S WHERE LOGISTICS COME IN WITH NORTH KOREA, A LEADER.  NO, MAKE THAT GREAT LEADER!

SOVIET TOOTHBRUSH TODAY.  SOVIET DENTAL FLOSS TOMORROW.

Every day life is getting better.  Without pity, we will decimate and obliterate tooth decay.

From each according to his gums, to each according to his obsession with Soviet Toothbrush.

Bloody gums are your patriotic duty!

Comments
  1. Leonit Brushnev says:

    Is beautiful music to milk goats to.

  2. Captain Wayno says:

    Bravo! This is the best stuff since the creator of Soviet Tooth Brush sold his antique shower curtain collection to the North Koreans… for a defective nuke… there is a reason for all that testing.

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